Friday, December 23, 2011

I sit here all the time with something on my mind.I cant seem to get away from all the pain and suffering why do i feel this way every day. I dont know why i cry. I dont know why i wanna die. I dont understand myself maybe i should kill myself. I feel sad and it makes me mad.

I go to work every day. I feel like a jerk what can i say.

There is noone that can help me noone to save me from the shit im going through. None to say i love you.
There is none to hold me when im alone. Noone to call me on the phone. 

There is none to talk to when im in need.Noone to stitch me if i bleed.Maybe one day I will wake up and see the light but until then my life will always be a fight.

People say im jealous.. high headed... because they got all these & i dont... f**k u. i dont want a f**king normal life like u... im not gonna cry.. im not gonna die... but you ll see my attitude from now...

Saturday, December 03, 2011

B Day-Color-Nature

Found it while surfing....

If your birthday is on  .....  Scroll down to find out about your  nature .... 

December 23rd - January 1st Red                                 
January 2nd - January 11th  Orange                             
January 12th - January 24th Yellow                             
January 25th - February 3   Pink                               
February 4th - February 8th Blue                               
February 9th - 18th February     Green                               
February 19th - 28th February    Brown                               
March1st - Match 10th       Aqua                               
March 11 - March 20th       Lime                               
March 21 st                 Black                               
March 22 nd - March 31st    Purple                             
April 1st - April 10th      Navy                               
April 11th - April 20th     Silver                             
April 21st - April 30th     White                               
May 2nd - May 14th          Blue                               
May 15th - May 24th         Gold                               
May 25th - June 3rd         Cream                               
June 4th - June13th         Gray                               
June 14 - June 23rd         Maroon                             
June 24th                   Gray                                                                                            
June 25 - July 4th          Red
July 5th - July 14th        Orange                             
July 15th - July 25 th      Yellow                             
July 26th - August 4 th     Pink                               
August 5th - August 13th    Blue                               
August 14th - August 23rd   Green                               
August 24 - September 2nd   Brown                               
September 3rd -  September12th     Aqua                               
September 13th - 22nd September  Lime                               
September 23rd     Olive                               
September 24th - 3rd October    Purple                             
October 4th - October 13th  Nave                               
October 14th - October 23rd Silver                             
October 24 - November 11th  White                               
November 12th - 21st  November    Gold                               
November 22nd - December1st Cream                               
December 2nd - December11th Gray                               
December 12th - 21st  December    Maroon                             
December 22nd       Teal                               

Cute and lovable type, you are picky but always in love ...and     
liked to be loved. Fresh and cheerful, but can be "moody" at       
times. Capable with people, nice, soft, and that can love you for   
the way you are. Likes people that are easy to talk to, and can     
make you feel comfortable.                                         
Competitive and sportive. Don't like losing and always cheerful!   
You are trustworthy, and very out-going. You choose love           
carefully, and don't fall in love easily. But once you find the     
right one, you don't let go for a long long time.                   
You are mostly interested in your looks. And have high standards   
in picking love. You think and make a solution precisely, and       
hardly make stupid mistakes. You like to lead, and is easy for you 
to make new friends.                                               
You are attractive, and active. You never hide your feelings, and   
express everything that's inside. But can be selfish at times. You 
want to be noticed, and don't like to be treated unequally. You     
can brighten up people's day. You know what to say at the right     
time, and you have a good sense of humor.                           
You get along well with new people. You are not really a shy       
person, but sometimes you can hurt people's feelings by your       
words... You like to be loved and noticed by your lover, but       
mostly you are single, waiting for the right person.               
You know what's right and what's wrong. You are cheerful and out   
going. It's hard for you to find the one you want, but once you     
find the right person, you won't be able to fall in love again for 
a long time.                                                       
You are always trying your best in everything, and like to help     
and care for other people. But you are not easily satisfied. You   
have negative thoughts, and you look for romantic love like in a   
You are sweet and innocent. Trusted by many people, and have a     
strong leadership towards relationships. You make good decision     
and make the right choice at the right time. And always dreaming   
of romantic relationship.                                           
You are intelligent, and know what's right. You like to take       
things go your way, which can sometimes cause trouble or not       
thinking about other people's feelings. But you are patient when   
it comes to love... Once you get a hold of the right person, it's   
hard for you to find a better love.                                 
You are responsible for your own actions, and you know how to       
treat people. You always have goals to reach, and are competitive. 
When it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust someone,     
but once you find the right friend, you trust them for ever.       
You are mysterious, never selfish and get interested in things     
easily. Your day can be sad or happy depending on your mood. You   
are popular between friends but you can act stupid at times, and   
forget things easily. You go for person that's trustworthy.         
You are calm, but easily stressed out. You get jealous easily, and 
complain over little things. You can't get stuck into one thing,   
but you have a capable personality for everyone to trust you and   
like you.                                                           
You are imaginative and shy, but you like trying new things. You   
like to challenge yourself. You learn things easily, and like       
"Hard to get". Your love life is normally hard and confusing.       
You dream and have goals in your life. You get jealous easily and   
you don't react to things easily. You are different and sometimes   
thought highly by others.                                           
You are warm and light hearted. You seem to flow well with friends 
and family. You don't like violence and know what's right. You are 
kind and cheerful, but don't envy other people easily.             
You are active and sportive. It's hard for other people to become   
close with you, but you fall in love easily. But once you find out 
you can't get something, you give up and let go easily as well.     
You have low self-esteem, and very picky. You are artistic and     
like to fall in love, but you let your love pass by, by loving     
with your mind, not your heart.                                     
You are attractive, and love your life. You have a strong feeling   
towards everything. And very easily distracted. Once you get angry 
at someone, it's hard for you to forgive them.                     
Your feelings change suddenly and easily. You are always lonely,   
and like travelling. You are truthful, but listen and believe       
other people too easily. It's hard to find love for you, and you   
get lost in love easily. Sometimes you get hurt by love.           
You are challenging, and have the "guts". But you don't like       
changes in your life. And once you make a decision, you keep it     
that way for a long time. Your love life is also challenging, and   
You are responsible for your own actions, and you know how to       
treat people. You always have goals to reach, and are competitive. 
When it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust someone,     
but once you find the right friend, you trust them for ever.  
I couldn't tell why i'm sad... 
i couldn't tell why i'm crying...
I couldn't tell why i feel so numb and empty... 
I couldn't tell you why i feel so disgusting...
I couldn't explain why i hate waking up everyday... 
I couldn't tell how much i hate not being able to sleep... 
I couldn't tell how much i hate waiting...
I couldn't tell how much i hate the future... 
I couldn't tell why i'm so afraid... 
I couldn't tell why i never fit in... 
I couldn't tell because, i just don't know.